Two loves for one heart
by Les milles et une nuits
Summary: Love is something beautiful, and sometimes very painful. But it's depending mostly who loves who. OOC. AU. rating T for language perhaps M later (also for the language) Warning: if you're looking for a story ShizNat with fluff and love all the way, this story isn't for you.
1. Prologue: Hurt

It's my first time writing directly a story in English without using a French version that probably the reason it's short. No beta. Sorry for the mistakes.

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Natsuki Kuga twenty-five year old sighted deeply. She was lying lazily in her bed, her emeralds stayed calm on the floor, next to her, a beautiful naked woman snore lightly in her embrace. No it was this woman who seeks some comfort and not the contrary. She hated demonstration of love. All she wanted was sex and nothing more. Fists clenched on her side, sadness was showing in Kuga face.

_Again she made that mistake…_

_Again she was so weak…_

_Again she felt so hopeless…_

_And she did it again and again, not learning her lesson_

_And she will continue in that same path…_

_This is pointless to think about it, and she realized too late._

The mysterious woman rolled on the side toward Natsuki. Blue eyed watch her intensely, and a shy smile appeared. The blunette nibbled her lower lip and faked a nervous smile.

"Hey," came a sleepy voice.

"Hey…'' the emerald girl answered, guilt burning her stomach. She can't even think properly…she never had…her emeralds wavered away.

"That night…was awesome…"

"Yeah, I know…thanks."

''And you are so modest.'' The stranger laughed heartily burying her face in Natsuki's neck who stiffed. She wanted this person to leave immediately her home. She didn't want to talk, she didn't to kiss, she didn't want her in her side…

''Yeah I know…Perfection isn't easy.'' The brunette joke even it wasn't funny.

Kuga felt hands roaming sensually her body. She was horrible, all she wanted was freeing from her libido, and after that; forgotten all.

"Another round?" Kuga asked licking her lips in anticipation.

''I can't ask more. I'm so hungry of you.'' Lips and bodies crashed each other begging for more. They kissed soft moans escaped for battling dominance and explore more of their skin. She brushed her hand on her long and silky blond hair.

''Shizuru~'' Kuga moaned out loudly barely containing her aroused moment.

"What?" The blond asked in disbelief stopping all actions.

"I-said something wrong?" The bluette asked surprise trying to remember her forgotten words.

"How did you call me?''

''Errr…''

''You have some nerve to calling me Shizuru! Who is she? Your grilfriend? Secret lover?" Damn it Kuga cringed internally finally realizing her mistake.

''I can't believe it! What is my name?""

"Your name is…Shiori?"

"NO!"

''Sakura?"

"No! My name is Shizumi! Contrary to you, I remember yours Natsuki even if now I won't! " The blond roared storming in the bed, she took all her clothes.

''I'm sorry."

''I really don't fucking care about your apologies. You're like those despicable men! Only searching for sex! It was only an another quick fuck right?''

''Yes…no…I mean…well…we never said there will be more than that….''

''I can't believe this! Yesterday in the bar you said exactly the contrary! You wanted a serious relationship.''

''You kidding! That's not true. I remember saying I only want some fun and you agree with me, it just a one-night stand. I never force you. If you are unhappy, you can go.''

''You are a Bitch! Don't call me!''

''Oh don't be afraid, I have no intention to do it…'' Shizumi furious grabbed her purse and quickly left the apartment.

Natsuki cringed when she heard the doors slamming loudly. She sighted defeat, yes she already knew she was a bitch, a dick for over a month and she can't deny it. In fact, it didn't bother anymore…because she will stay one…

''See what you done to me Shizuru…I'm an horrible person because of you….because of my love for you…I'm always looking for someone who exactly look like you…even if it's not you, not even close. Having sex only thinking about you is disgusting...and if you know it…you will probably hate me…running away from me. I'm sick! I already hate myself for my weakness…I can't bear if you hate me Zuru…'' Natsuki's phone vibrating, she watched the message from her best friend…and sobs escaped rapidly.

_Don't forget about tomorrow my Suki_

_Love you, your best friend :)_

"Why I love you so much that I have the feeling I'm dying slowly?"


	2. Chapter 1 Effects on Happiness

_Thanks for all the anonymous reviews and the favourites. I Hope you will always like._

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_**Chapter 01 Effects on Happiness**_

_Her life was perfect, like a dream, a beautiful fairy tale that all little Girl had…_

_She always had what she wants without asking._

_She didn't specially deserve them, but she will lie if she didn't want them._

_Why did she have all this happiness?_

_She didn't know herself…_

_But what she was afraid the most in her life was,_

_One day she will lose everything;_

_That she had anymore her happy ending…_

Shizuru Fujino twenty-eight year old sighted happily. Sating comfortably in her bed, she saw her boyfriend Reito half-naked stayed on her side and smile lovely; he brought every morning her favourite's dishes. He knew her so well. More than herself…The Kyoto-Ben woman sipped with delight her favourite cup of tea and took a bit of croissant.

"Reito…if you continue to treat my like a Queen, I think you will have to take the responsibly for the rest of your life." The man grinned broadly at her, and kissed on the top of her head, next her lips.

"It will be my pleasure to be your slave my dear queen." The chestnut goodness laughed when Kanzaki bowed.

"Ara…I never knew you have this kind of…fantasy Mr Kanzaki…"

"Only for you my lovely Mrs Kanzaki…"

"Ah-ah. I'm not your wife.'' The crimson-eyed beauty gave a quick peck into Reito jaw.

''Yet.''

''You right, but _now_ I'm still a Fujino."

"Only for a month. After that you will be all mine. Nobody can steal you from me."

"Same here. You are very popular with woman and they are so younger than me." Shizuru remarked sadly, she hid her face between her hands letting escape a sob.

"No, no, no darling, I know what you are trying to do. You pretend to cry, you just want to play with me. But I'm not stupid. I perfectly know you, little teasing demon. And I still love you. You are lucky to find me."

"Ikezu! How dare you treat me like that, I'm your wife."

"You mean soon-to-be wife?" Reito added with a pouting Shizuru.

"I can wait when it will happen."

"Me too. So what will you do today sweetheart?"

"Hmm…I will probably go for some shopping…flowers, buying a weeding dress with Natsuki?" Fujino said with a bright smile. Meanwhile his fiancé get up from their bed and looked around the floor, he was searching his underwear. Shizuru studied attentively his partner features. They were strong, attractive just like the rest of his body, but his best feature remained the softest yellow eyes she had ever seen. He was so passionate, so nice, and comprehensive. She never had been with this kind of man. Not only thinking about himself, about sex, and his own pleasure. Her previous relationships were chaotic. She was dumped, betrayed, cheated. But now she was glad to open her heart. Licking her lips, she admired his white skin, toned body and dark hair. His looks were deceptive however. Yes, he was charming, and it wasn't a lie. But what attracted the most Shizuru about this man was his good heart. He never pushed her. He never pulled. In fact, he just let Shizuru be herself…even in the start she tried so bad to be perfect for him.

Over the past several months, Shizuru's affection for him grew. In fact, first time she saw, she wasn't interested. But with time, she let him enter in her world and he stayed. She knew from the start they are perfect for each other.

"How lucky you, and poor me, it's unfair. To the contrary of you who have all the fun, I have a meeting with some potential partners for Kanzaki industries."

"Perhaps you can come for lunch?" Reito grinned when he saw those pair of beautiful rubies staring hopefully at him.

"I don't know, I don't to disturb your moment' with Natsuki-chan…she will be very sad."

"Why?" surprised, Shizuru arched her thin brows and tilted her heard to the side.

"She hates me.'' The man answered honestly shrugging his shoulders.

''That' not true. She liked you…a lot? ''

"I'm not sure, the way she look at me tell me you are totally wrong. You don't see her death glare or the way she acted when she sees me. Like an enemy…You know, I think I can understand her…perhaps you have to spend more time with your friend. She is certainly jealous I'm taking away from her."

"But I see her yesterday."

"For what Zuru?"

"…preparing our wedding…like previous days…"

"And what you will do today?"

"Preparing…again…our weeding…I'm horrible…isn't it? I only thing about me and I let alone my best friend…she probably hate me." Composing herself, Shizuru take a deep breath when Kanzaki walked toward her.

"Nobody can hate you; nobody. You can spend more time with her, doing activities that you both used to do. Also you are not horrible. You are busy with our weeding, your work, parents,…we aren't anymore teenager. We have a life, and all the results."

"You are the nicest person I never know. I'm so lucky to have you…" She glanced up to see her fiancé attempting to straighten his tie, it wasn't perfect, so she helped him but before, she grabbed firmly his tie and kiss him hungrily.

"Even if we can't have lunch today, perhaps another time?"

"Of course, we will have a lot time together in the future."

"Reito…Are you really in a hurry?"

"…there is a lot of traffic today…it's not my fault if I'm little late isn't it?" The tea addict curved up a smile when her future husband removed his shirt and pants.

"Yes, you right."


	3. Chapter 2 Our distance

Another chapter, this time with some ShizNat moments.

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**_Chapter 02: Our distance_**

_When I look at her I see an angel, (Natsuki)_

_When she looks at her, she sees so much pain. (Shizuru)_

_When I saw her smile, I'm so happy._

_When she sees her smile, she is also happy._

_When I realize I lose her, I die slowly._

_When she realizes they are growing apart, she doesn't know what to do._

Natsuki driving her car was nervous and mostly worried; minutes ago her best friend let a mysterious message in her phone. She can't decipher her state of mind, so she went directly to the café the ruby eyed woman indicated in her message.

Kuga remembered again and again her words.

_**'Natsuki we have to talk…It's really important. Please come.'**_

Many questions hit the brunette. Perhaps her wedding got cancelled, and she broke up with her rival? A smile crept slowly on her face…but shame gain rapidly on her earlier behaviour. How could she be horrible and selfish? If it happened, Shizuru surely be devastated, she hated her crying, and it hurt her so badly. But no matter what, she will be always there for her.

The brunette entered hurriedly in the café and saw the object of her thought.

"Natsuki! I'm here!" Surprised about Fujino friendly demeanour, the latter was waving her hand indicating her presence. Shizuru was positively delighted. So there is no trouble in paradise. Instead of thinking about it, Natsuki went directly to Shizuru table and saw it was filled out with food that she can't even see a single empty space. There was Coffee, orange juice, pancake, marmalade, eggs, brioche, cheeses and fruits.

"Wow it's gargantuan!" The brunette remarked sarcastically.

"Good morning to you too, Natsuki."

"Will you eat all this stuff? I'm not sure it's humanly possible. You will be sick and take a lot of weight."

"Ara really? I didn't notice. But it's for both of us, it won't be a problem. Also I know your appetite."

"Well, I almost not see you behind this mountain which have same size of Himalaya. Also I'm not a monster. My stomach won't take it well. If I have to go to hospital, you have to pay the bill and my funeral."

"You are so mean! I try to be nice to you. Ikezu." Shizuru said with a pout. Natsuki laughed lightly and remove her jacket, and sat front of her friend who smiled brightly at her. A blush appeared instantly in Kuga face. She tried to contain her love, and watched feverously the food and not a certain crimson orbs beauty. She licked nervously her lips.

"I'm sorry…thanks."

"It's alright. I forgive you because you are special."

"It is in a good or bad way?"

"Always in good way, even when you are mean."

"I'm honoured."

"Oh; you have to be."

"_I know._ Did you buy all the products of café and the others around us?"

"Of course not!"

"What do you want to talk?"

"I don't know how to tell you…it's complicated…it concern me and Reito…and…'' Natsuki shrugged, turning away to focus her gaze on the far wall.

"Don't tell me…what you want to talk with me…it's…that you are pregnant?" The brunette asked swallowing hard afraid to lose definitively her best friend who coughed her tea. Shizuru turned to look at her, confusion weighing down her brow. And she saw seriousness and fears in these beautiful emerald eyes.

"What? NO!"

"Thanks a god…" Kuga whispered. It was barely a murmur.

"Did you say something Natsuki?" She paused a moment, before adding forcibly.

"No, nothing. I'm just very hungry, that all."

"I see…so eat! There is plenty of food."

"Ok."

"Enjoy your meal Suki."

"Ohdff…ywwouf…too… " Natsuki responded with mouth full almost choked all she had eaten.

"Easy Natsuki or you will suffocate, and I will have no choice to make mouth to mouth." Many dirty pictures came to Natsuki's mind, and she spited her food and drunk a lot of orange juice.

"Shizuru!"

"What? It's not my fault if you don't chew correctly your food before swallowing…"

"No kidding." For a long moment, Natsuki was silent. She didn't dare to watch her interlocutor. However she felt her persistent gaze. It made her ill-at-ease. And suddenly a hand covered hers. She recognized immediately the owner. Her heart swelled of emotion. A simple gesture made from Shizuru made her weak. She breathed erratically. She wanted to convey her burning feelings, to take her hands… and lead her to bed but she forgotten something…and she can't avoid it…the shinning diamond in her ring finger. Instinctively, she removed her hand. Fujino took it as a rejection.

"Natsuki I'm sorry…" Surprise by the hurt ing her friend voice, Kuga finally watched her. Tears invaded her ruby eyes.

"Shizuru! Why are crying! Please don't cry." Kuga begged running in her side.

"I'm such a bad friend with you…" The brunette couldn't take any more discussion when the person she loves the most in the world was in pain. She lunged forward, cutting off whatever explanation the Kyoto-ben woman was giving, her hugged her. Shizuru jumped at the unexpected move. But she didn't push away. She welcomed the embrace.

"What are you talking about Zuru? You are not a bad friend, you always there when I need the most."

"But Reito notice I abandon you because of our wedding, I realize too late it was true, I'm so sorry...please forgiving…" _Kanzaki you bastard! How dare you, it's not your business! I didn't interfere with Shizuru!_

"You never abandon me, never. I'm so happy to help you with your wedding…really..." Natsuki's fingertips were resting against her cheeks.

"But we only talk about that…."

"And I doesn't bother me…I promise you…I love you." Kuga acknowledged shyly, moving back a step waiting for the tea drinker to compose herself.

"I love you too." Shizuru said innocently, but her words broke Natsuki heart because her love was only friendly and nothing more. This time, it was the brunette who wanted to cry.


	4. Chapter 3 Complicity

Thanks for all your comments, I know this story have a lot of drama and there will be more…and some want more ShizNat, but we need time to build a relationship. It will be too easy if Shizuru fall instantly in Natsuki arms.

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Chapter 03: complicity

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10 years ago…

Why are you so sad Natsuki...?

I'm not, it just...I'm always like that...

That true...even the first I meet you were...

I was what?

...Nothing...

...

No matter what Suki, I will always stay in your side…

_Don't make that kind of promise Shizuru, because I will believe it…_me too…

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Shizuru and Natsuki in their respective place stayed silence appreciating her breakfast and each other presence. Both of them felt her relationship had change since college. They are less close than before… but the fault wasn't only in Shizuru side. Natsuki tried to avoid her…but she never refused to meet her…she can't avoid her…even if she wanted desperately.

"How many years do we know each other Natsuki?" Shizuru suddenly asked to her friend who only blinked in response.

"I don't know Shizuru, perhaps ten years…even a little more…since high school."

"You right… You are probably my only best friend…"

"And you also are my only best friend…" The brunette said trying to smile, but it was bitter. Probably because her coffee was cold; when she took a sip it was unpleasant, as the conversation. Natsuki's face was a mask of emotion; she learned long time ago to hide her feelings but her heart still aching.

"Do you think about your future?"

"Sometimes...and you? I mean I know you will marry Reito, you are director of this luxury hotel that belongs to your family and-."

"I always want a family… a daughter and son…even a dog and cat. I never have a real family...so I want to build my own. Did you think about that Suki?"

"No…not really…"

"Why?" Fujino asked worried about the cold tone of her friend voice.

"I don't know…I'm not interested…" _Because I only want you, a family with you, with a cat, dog and daughter or son who looks like you…all you want…is what I want to give you… Natsuki don't be stubborn! Shizuru is just of friend and nothing…more…but instead I learned loneliness, to don't give my heart…but sometimes be alone is stronger…_

Shizuru ordered them two more coffees and Natsuki looked at her sceptical.

"What?"

"You didn't order tea."

"And?" The ruby eyed goodness responded arching sceptically a brow.

"It's weird…"

"It's not."

"Yes it is."

"I can drink other stuff than tea. Coffee, orange juice, water, wine, beer."

"Beer? Are you kidding me?"

"No, why it's so incredible?"

"Who are you? You are not my Shizuru. I remember a time you drink almost each hour."

"That not true! I have class; and-ok, I hate you. You are so mean…Ikezu…"

"Yeah I know…" Shizuru and Natsuki smiled to each other and burst into laughter.

Natsuki took a huge, sloppy bite out of cheese cake and groaned.

"Good, huh?" The ruby eyed beauty said proudly.

"Yes, the food here is absolutely delicious, thank you so much."

"I'm glad you like; we can come here another time?"

"Yes that will be great with Kanzaki." Kuga said trying to hide her bitterness. But she couldn't contain the anger that coiled in her stomach.

"No, I mean only you and me."

"Why?"

"Because I want to spend time with you, is it bad?"

"No but…"

"There is no but. Accept it; you have no chance against me."

"Alright, you won." Natsuki answered nonchalantly but in the inside she was so happy.

"So Natsuki, what do you want to do today?" Shizuru asked biting a strawberry. Emeralds were watching attentively pink lips. Surprised, Natsuki coughed to distract herself from friend temptress lips.

"Err, we don't have to buy dresses?" _For your weeding with your stupid fiancé_…The brunette wanted to add but don't do it, she didn't hurt her friend's feelings.

"You want to do shopping with me! And buying a dress without I force you? We have to go now before you change your mind!" The tea drinker exclaimed clapping in delight her hands.

"What! Are we having the same conversation?"

"Of course! I know a fabulous shop in the city center. You will look incredible! Hmm...red and blue will be perfect for you. And we have to buy some shoes and not sneakers." Fujino pondered a moment.

"Wait! We won't buy a weeding dress?"

"You want a weeding dress? Ok…but…I never imagined you want one…"

"No I mean for you...for your...wedding?"

"Another day."

"Shizuru I know what you are trying to do, I glad you are concerned about me and our friendship. But I'm fine. You don't have to force you do that."

"I'm not forcing myself; I want to spend time with you…I will think it's **You** who didn't want..."

"No, I like be with you...It just I'm not sure it's a great idea, your wedding is soon…" Kuga groaned, and slouched a little in her seat.

"Please…" The chestnut haired woman begged with a puppy face. Her friend rolled her eyes but couldn't suppress a smirk.

"Alright, but after that...we will find you a wedding dress."

"Thank you so much!" Shizuru giggled like a little girl. And poor Natsuki, she continued to fall so deeply for her. Suddenly, fingers brushed delicately her face, and the brunette stopped breath when her friend came up so close to her face. She felts her sweet perfume, peach, and her warm breath caress softly her skin. Shivers ran up thought the brunette body.

"Shi-shi-zuru? What are yo-"

"Shh…don't move…. "Shizuru removed the chocolate with her warm finger lingering slowly in Natsuki lips who took her wrist firmly. She sucked sensually Shizuru's finger that let escape a low moan when hot and wet tongue skimmed her finger. Realizing her action, Natsuki released Fujino wrist.

"Oh god! I'm so sorry Zuru." Kuga stammered, she was into a full-fledged blush.

"I'm fine; I never imagined you were gifted with your tongue." Shizuru joked trying to breathe normally. Even if she was always confuse by the brunette behaviour but decided to hide it.

"You have no idea." She said, her voice still teasing but slightly huskier than usual.

"Now you flirt back? Interesting~ I know the reason you are so popular with women."

"…yeah…I suppose…" _But not with the one I really want._

"Wow that was hot." An unknown voice interrupted our friends who were startled and distant themselves.

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So who is this mysterious person ?


	5. Chapter 4 WTF is going on here?

Thanks again for your comment, I know my grammar isn't the best, so if somebody want to beta my story, I will be grateful. Also for the mysterious person...I was evil...mostly of you thinking it was Chie or Nao. You will see if you are right or not. Also for Shiznat13 I don't do voodoo, it wasn't me who poke your heart with niddles xD.

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**_5 years ago:_**

"What about her Natsuki?" Shizuru asked in a pensive way.

"No! Shizuru…please…can we go or drinking?" Kuga responded sulking.

"Why are you always like this? She's cute, no? She's blond and tall."

"Cute is for a kitten! Not a person!" The blunette retorted finishing her drink.

"But sometimes I think you are so cute, like a puppy."

"I'm not a puppy Zuru!"

"Perhaps but you still cute, especially when you blush and pout like now."

"That not true! If that was the case, instead of finding me a girlfriend, be mine?"

"I remember a time when you said I wasn't your type. I was so hurt…sob…" Ruby eyed beauty tried to fake cry but an immense smile decorated her face.

"Please don't cry! You are totally my type... I mean…"

"Oh I know Suki. I was simply joking around, so did you find an attractive woman you want? There is a lot of choice in this club. Look at this one!" All this time, Natsuki was attentively watching Shizuru.

" …You're a lot worse than my mother…"

"I don't care. She's right to worry about your love life. Look at her; she is your type isn't it?"

"…ugh. Please somebody kill me now..."

* * *

**_Chapter 04: What the fuck is going on here?_**

At the mentioning of her name, it was stirring Shizuru's attention. Her eyes widened when she recognized the person who called her.

"Ahn? What are you doing here? "The latter smiled and gave her a quick peck on her lips. Green demon invaded Natsuki eyes. She glared this woman hugging in firm embrace the crimson eyes beauty, who still shocked.

"Hello Shizuru. I'm seeing you on your wedding. Don't you remember, I'm one of your bridesmaids?" Ahn greeted politely.

"…Y-yes…but…I…you…why…" Kuga seemed puzzled by unusual behaviour from her friend. She never saw her like this, disturbed and ill-at-ease.

"I have to come next week isn't it? I mean it's what I said on the phone…" Ahn asked with an innocent smile.

"…yes…"

"And I'm early, aren't you happy?"

"…I suppose…" The sandy-haired beauty let out long breath in response.

"Your enthusiasm hurt me… but you are beautiful…with a nice and voluptuous body. So I forgive you.''

''…err…ookini?"

"I want badly to kidnap you before your wedding, and nobody will know."

"Please…could you remove your hands from…my…butt?" Reported ruby eyed woman a bit annoyed.

"Ok! That enough you pervert crazy bitch!" Natsuki said angrily capturing brutally Ahn's arm when this woman had wandering hand in inappropriate way to her friend. She growled and protected her friend virtues from this predator.

"It's alright Natsuki…she's kind of special…but no harm done…thank to you…" Fujino smiled comfortingly. Her hand found Kuga's forearm. The brunette was fully aware that she looked like a jealous and possessive girlfriend, but couldn't do anything about it. Fortunately, her friend didn't seem to notice. Contrary to Ahn who had a wide smiled.

"Hey! That wasn't nice…but true…"

"Yes totally," Natsuki said, jaw clenched tightly.

"Oh my, I'm so sorry. I don't want to make someone jealous. Is your girlfriend/fiancée there? Nice choice. I'm envious. Why are all beautiful women taken?"

"I'm not jealous!" Kuga snarled with a frown but can't hide her blushing at mentioning of fiancée.

"Don't joke around Luu. That's not funny, it's boring. We are no longer children." The chestnut haired goddess sighted a bit tired with all this nonsense drama.

"It is you who has become boring Shizuru. Your fiancée is brave to bear you." Ahn joked lightly and waiting some reactions.

"She's not my fiancée and you know it. She is my best friend, a precious sister, part of my family." Theses words broke Natsuki heart but she was glad Shizuru care about her…even it was only friendship..

"And she's not boring!" The blunette added pissed-off. She tried to not lose her temper.

"Nothing more?" Ahn continued.

"No."

"So Surprise? Please Shizuru, tell me she's in the wedding party this beauty?" Hungry eyes seemed to swallow Natsuki whole body without any shame. She felt completely naked, just for be sure, she watched if that wasn't the case.

"I suppose…and you are?"

"Hello gorgeous, I'm lesbian and single and you?" The tea drinker rolled her eyes, she disliked this situation. Ahn was like a tornado; she brought all the problems and let devastation.

"Hi lesbian and single. You're certainly not subtle. I'm not interested, and I'm Shizuru's best friend." Natsuki answered. _Interesting woman but she was too open for my taste. Her mind and probably her legs…_

"You are funny one, I like you." Luu smirked.

''It's not reciprocate. I'm not sure it's nice to meet you…''

"So…that means pleasure is all mine? Great! It's my speciality."

"I do not want to hear these bullshit, try with somebody else." The brunette growled.

"Shizuru?" Luu said biting her lips.

"Continue and I punch you!" Kuga threatened seriously clinching her fists.

"Hmm…nasty and violent, also in bed? I like that." Anh purred sensually approaching emerald eyed woman.

"You freak out the hell of me! Get out of me!" Kuga cringed bumping into Shizuru who almost lost her balance. But Kuga caught in time her slender hips.

"Shizuru! I'm so sorry! I didn't want to hurt you." Natsuki said very upset when she saw red mark in Fujino hand.

"Ara, I know…and I'm fine…"

"But your hand…"

"Is fine. Don't worry about me."

"Aww…you two are so cute. You have never sex together? The coffee is filing with sexual tension. Don't you want to do a threesome with me?"

**"Of course not!"** Natsuki and Shizuru answered simultaneously with a blush.

"You Girls are not funny!"


	6. Chapter 5 Threat

_**8 years ago in Natsuki's bedroom.**_

This day was the most difficult moment to live for Natsuki. She was afraid…losing her will be a horrible experience…but if she lied…her friend will never forgive her. She hadn't choice but tell the truth.

"Natsuki what's wrong? Why are you crying like this? What happened to you? Talk to me, please…I'm here for you…somebody hurt you or bully you? Who is this person? I will kill him or her slowly!" Shizuru mean it hugging firmly her best friend.

"No, that not what you think…I have to tell you something…but I'm afraid…after that…you will hate me…I can't bear...if it was the case…" Kuga hiccupped inconsolable.

_How she will look at me after that?_

_Our relationship will change?_

"Of course, that will never happen…" Crimson eyed beauty assured with confidence. Natsuki almost believed her words, but fear was far stronger than she ever imagined.

"…I…"

"Yes Suki?"

"I…can't…it's too hard…for me…I'm sure you will hate me…or running away...and-and…"

"Natsuki look at me." The latter with burning eyes obeyed shyly. "I like you a lot, you are my best friend. The best thing that happened in my life…you are my sunshine."

"Zuru…you…also…my…sun…my life…"

"I'm glad to hear that. If you said you kill intentionally my dog…I will be very upset…and I won't talk to you during one day or two, ok perhaps more. And I will probably want to know your reasons… "

"No! I didn't do that!"

"You want to burn my house?"

"Of course not!"

"You insulate me behind my back? You hate me from the beginning and use me? You don't want me anymore in your side?" Shizuru said sadly.

"NO! Never!"

"Then, there is no problem."

"You don't understand! Please…just one thing...tell me…you will never leave me…" The brunette implored desperate.

"I promise you I will always stay in your side, no matter what; you are my best friend…always…see…" The brunette watched her friend wrist and remarked a simple bracelet in tissue.

"You still keep my ugly present…"

"It's not ugly, I like it. You did it for me. It's beautiful."

"It's only for you. Other clever people already trash it." Natsuki finally joked with a dimpled smile. Shizuru pinched lightly Natsuki's cheeks.

"Don't forget. I'm a special woman."

"Yes you are." Emerald eyed teenager confirmed with a nod with a blushing Fujino.

"Tell me. Trust me…I will never hurt you in purpose…"

"…I'm…a…lesbian…" Kuga quickly admitted terrorized and waited nervously her friend reaction.

"Yes and?"

"I love girls!" Kuga shouted exasperate. She was thinking her coming out turn different from this. And nothing, she didn't know if it was a good a bad thing.

"I know what a lesbian, thank you. Ara, don't tell me…you fall in love with Miss Maria?"

"What? Ugh! Of course not!" Natsuki grimaced.

"You know I won't criticize your choice, If you like…gran…I mean _**very**_ old woman…I'm supporting you totally."

"NO! I'm not blind! That all? You are not chocked, disgusted?"

"Well, if you like old woman...it's your choice." Shizuru remarked shrugging a bit.

"I'm not interested in Miss Maria!"

"Midori our teacher?"

"No! Arrrg! Shizuru I love girls! But I don't say I was in love now!"

"Oh kannin na...and what? You still my Natsuki. Your choice of love doesn't concern me, if you love women and you are happy, that great for you. So I don't understand why you are getting so upset. Your mother didn't take well your orientation? Or you are afraid to tell her? Perhaps you like somebody and she reject you? Well she is stupid! You deserve better!" The tea drinker said surprise when she met a firm embrace from the blunette.

* * *

_**Chapter 5: threat**_

"Fine. I'm hungry!" Luu wanted to sit next to her cousin but Kuga took the seat before her. Natsuki glare at her with a look 'yeah that not gonna happen! Don't dream!' Ahn disappointed, sulked like a reprimanded child on the other side, but her eyes shined with malice. And Shizuru frowned not really enthusiast. Nothing good will happen.

"Ouch! It's hurt like hell!" Luu grimaced of pain holding her knee "Why did you kick me my Natsuki?"

"First of all, I'm not yours pervert! Secondly; it wasn't me, even if it wasn't a bad idea to kick you." The brunette answered nonchalantly the question.

"So who did that?"

"It was me. You deserved it. Aren't you ashamed of you behaviour?" Shizuru responded irritate.

"Never."

"Well, I don't like the way you touch my leg and it seems I wasn't the only one."

"Ouch!" Luu complained touching again her leg. "Again Shizuru? You are so violent...I like that... especially if you spank me in your laps, I'm such a bad girl."

"OUCH! OUCH! OUCH! Hey! Stop it! Enough! You will break my leg!" Ahn whined like a kicked dog.

"It was me all this time. Why did you do that pervert?" The brunette retorted.

"I don't like to waste time with long preliminaries. Sometimes I like fast and directly." A blush bloomed in Natsuki face knowing perfectly the 'subtle' implication; she can't contain any longer her laughter when she saw her best friend's horrified face.

"Ahn stop it, there are children here! And I'm your cousin!" The sandy-haired women said trying to contain all the flirting she certainly didn't want to see.

"Ok! Perhaps later.''

"Or never."

"Wait a minute! Did I hear correctly? Your cousin?! This person …she…is your cousin? I mean this unpleasant pervert without any shame is your family?" Kuga looked at Shizuru unbelieving.

"Yes,"

"Hey! Don't be so rude!" Ahn barked bothered but nobody paid attention on her.

"My mother has a half-sister who has a daughter you can see front of you."

"I never know you have an aunt...or other family…" The brunette added surprise.

"It's kind of complicated…it's a family affair…" The chestnut haired beauty nodded.

"And it's probably my fault if my mother and aunt are on bad terms." Luu confessed staring her cousin who watched intensively her tea.

"Why?" The brunette asked heartbeat beating loudly in her ribcage.

"Because I'm lesbian."

"Oh…"

"It's nothing to do with you Ahn…" Fujino tried to reassure, but her words seemed empty. Even Kuga can feel it.

"**You** know perfectly that not true…"

"You…don't look like each other…" Natsuki interrupted sensing tension, so she tried pathetically to change the subject of conversation comparing difference between Ahn and Shizuru. Except their hair color, Ahn was looking at her with a lustful glare and Shizuru had a genuine smile.

"I know, I'm the prettiest one in Fujino's family…" Ahn praised herself and Shizuru threw her a sideways glance.

"I'm not sure about that." Natsuki chuckled and felt her phone vibrating in her trouser pocket. She sighted and excused herself to answer.

_-Hello?_

_-Natsuki?_

_-Youko? What's wrong?_

_-Daisy doesn't fell well. __Childbirth does not go well; I have to do a caesarean. Do you want to aid me? I know it's your rest day. It's your choice Natsuki but also a great opportunity for you._ Natsuki pondered a moment and saw Shizuru with her cousin; she didn't want to let them alone. There was something wrong between them.

_-I will come right away._

_-Okay, hurry._

* * *

To Kuga surprise, the two women were discussion in other languages than Japanese. She can't understand anything. Except her name or the English part.

"хорошо" Ahn said.

"хорошо, а у тебя" Shizuru answered flatly.

"Ik versta het niet. "

"Was ?"

"You have to find yourself. Natsuki…Ich finde sie sehr nett;"

" … "

"_她一定是个模特 _,不是吗 ？"_  
_

"Arrêtons toutes ces formalitées, je ne sais pas ce que tu cherches Ahn, mais je n'aime pas cela. »

"Pourquoi es-tu si méfiante ? As-tu des choses à te reprocher ?"

"Perché te conosciuto. "

"Molto ? O perfettamente ? "

"Err…Shizuru? "The latter frowned finally remarking the brunette and smile politely.

"Ara sorry. What did you say? "

"I have to go. It's work. I'm sorry."

"I see…I understand, don't worry about me."

"Yes don't worry Natsuki-chan I will take care of Shizuru." Ahn added seductively but nobody pay attention on her…again…

"Perhaps an other time? Or if Childbirth didn't take much time I can come back."

"Childbirth? You don't seem pregnant Natsuki…don't tell me you are a doctor like me? We are perfect for each other. " Luu suggested.

"Poor patients I probably won't go anymore in hospital, I'm too afraid of sexual harassment. No I'm veterinary. Sorry Shizuru, but I need to go." Before leaving, Shizuru caught Kuga's wrist.

"I meant what I said, Natsuki. Are we okay?"

"Shizuru….We're fine."

''Really my Natsuki? '' The bluette cringed not able to bear possessiveness. Not in this condition. Shizuru will never be 'hers' like she desperately want. She didn't see her like a family, but someone she wanted badly in her bad, sharing her love, just thinking like this made her sick…and hating more herself…

Natsuki flashed a forced smile at both women. "Later." She walked away, pulling herself from the touch she always craved these long years.

"So we go to shopping, I want to see you naked…I mean in your underwear but you can remove them if you prefer." These words made immediately stop Kuga who promise to herself to come back quickly. She will never let this woman alone with her Shizuru.

Few minutes later.

"Take the coffee and whatever you wish and go home." The chestnut haired woman responded coldly.

"Not a chance."

"Why are you really here Ahn? How did you know about my wedding? What do you want?" Fujino voice came out harder and louder but she didn't care, she had enough to play this game.

"Destroying all you care and have my dear Zuzu."


	7. Chapter 6 Family Secret

Hi everybody, thanks for you review, I'm sorry I didn't answer them, I was really busy. Also I don't know if I should continue this story, it turned into something that escape my principal idea. And it became more difficult to turn into Shiznat.

* * *

**9 years ago**

"Ne Shizuru, do you think you can love a woman? » Kuga gulped asking nervously, her friend who frowned.

"Love in romantic way and sexually?" The brunette blushed deeply totally embarrassed but nodded in agreement. She finally saw crimson eyed darkened…, not about want but anger.

"You don't have to answer!" Natsuki stammered afraid, her friend remarked fear and she exhaled softly, she caught Natsuki's hand and stoke them.

"No…don't worry…I don't know…I won't lie, I never thing about it…I mean…I know I prefer men because I…, don't have attraction for women. What I mean is…I don't even ask that kind of question. Why? Are you interested in me Suki?" Shizuru forced a tease.

"No! Of course not! You're not my type!"

"I'm hurt; you broke my pride in piece…ikezu…you have to take responsibility."

"No. I mean yes…ok I will start again. I'm not interested in you…that way. We are friend right?"

"Right. Best friend." Fujino added with a beautiful smile making Kuga imitated gesture.

"What I mean is-you know..;it's not-I..." Shizuru stopped Kuga rumbling touching lightly her lips with her finger.

"I know. You are pretty popular in our school, you with girls and me with boys and some girls."

"Yes, there is this girl, Tomoe…she confesses her love for you."

"You know it?" Fujino added incredulously.

"Yes…well…everybody knows in school."

"And you are angry that I didn't tell you? I didn't know it happens too fast. And you probably heard I politely reject her."

"Yes but she didn't seem to give up."

"Did she bother you?" The chestnut haired beauty asked worried.

"No," Natsuki lied. Her friend saw it perfectly. Natsuki didn't find, but also some student treated Shizuru badly because of jealousy of their friendship, so she stayed silent. She will talk to Tomoe.

* * *

_**Chapter 06: Family Secret**_

Natsuki had just finished helping with delivery of a mare, her foal almost suffocated in process and when he came out, he stood up with difficulty, but he had done it, the brunette knew she loved this job, she was not wrong about her choice in her study, it was hard, but in the end it was worth it... Just thinking be self-employed and having her own clinic eager her, patients. It made her a moment forget her aching heart. Kuga observed time; it was already 3 pm o'clock. She can finally see again Shizuru and…unfortunately her cousin.

She decided to phone her friend who replied almost in the end.

_"Hello? Natsuki? Are you alright? "_

_"Yes Shizuru, I just finished with job, where are you?"_

_"I 'm half naked in the dressing room of a store wedding dress." Some Shizuru's picture sexy and expensive underwear appeared in Natsuki's mind who tried her best to regain her senses. She almost get into a care accident or hitting a tree if she continued so._

_"Shizuru, do you want I help you? For example closing the zipper of your dress? " An annoying voice almost beg._

_"No I'm fine! Don't dare to come! I'm not ready!" Fujino growled while the Kuga strongly strangulated the wheel trying to not to kill Ahn when she will see her._

_"I'm coming Zuru! Wait for me!" The brunette warned._

_"Ara you do not have to hurry. » These words broke Natsuki's heart who thought the __Kyoto __beauty wasn't missing her presence. Was she only one to feel emptiness without her best friend presence ? _

_"I do not want you to get into an accident; I will never get over it if something bad happen because of me. I will wait patiently for you." This time, the brunette bridled her tears, her interlocutor did not know how these simple and honest words had such an impact on her. __Shizuru made her feel better without even trying._

_"Natsuki ... I need to talk to you ..."_

_"What's wrong? Something happened? You are alright?" Natsuki asked worried._

_"It will better to talk when we are together ... it's about Ahn ... you gotta be extremely careful around her... please promise me not to approach her in any circumstances. Or be close…"_

_"Why? You scare me Shizuru. What happened between you two? "_

_"Natsuki please I'm begging you, promise me to stay away from her. I usually never ask you anything. Just this time…trust me ... "The brunette began to bite her lower lip. She wanted badly to know more. But she knew that her friend was very reserved in regard to emotions, she had noticed from the beginning she had met her. Despite all her smiles, it was hidden something dark Kuga has never been discovered._

_"I promise ..."_

_"Ookini ... you don't know how much I'm relieved to hear it... I will let you drive quietly, bye Suki."_

_"Shizuru wai- "_ The latter already hung up, it's making more intrigued Kuga.

* * *

"So you try to prevent Natsuki not to approach me? Clever girl...Are you afraid of me? But I was only joking with you." Ahn questioned through curtains.

"It does not concern you. Why do not you leave me alone! "The bride-to-be snapped trying to not break her dress.

"You know I can not."

"You're simply crazy!"

"Maybe ... but who's to blame?"

"..." Kyoto-ben goddess laughed dryly. Maybe she will became insane.

''Now back to your sexy friend Natsuki." Shizuru gritted her teeth really tired about this sick game.

"She had nothing to do with our business."

"I think opposite…she's really...reaaally close to you. You can't deny it, she's a hottie. And her blushes…I want to see them in bed and listen her deep and husky voice. Hearing screaming my name will be aww…"

''Gosh Anh ! Enough! I don't want to hear more, she's my friend. So back off! Leave me alone! Disappear of my life damn it! I have enough! Why are you always here to torture me? It wasn't enough in past! Why I deserve that! Why me? What I have done to you?" Shizuru said almost sobbing.

"Don't be like that. I'm sure you don't think that. I know you."

"No you don't! You believe stupidly I'm yours, but I never have! I hate you, I always have! You are a perverse! And it's not only with your crude remarks!'

"Because of who I'm like that?" Shizuru sighted closing her eyes; she rubbed her temples to calm herself.

"Don't dare to continue!"

"Even if you don't want to acknowledge it, you broke my heart." Luu added.

"No, I don't want to hear it. We are cousin; I…you…never…"

"No we were in love and your mother had discover the truth and you freak out." Furious, Shizuru went out from her changing room, she didn't care about curious looks she received.

"Stop saying these nonsense! I never love you! You disgusted me! How dare you to lie like this!"

"It's you who lie and you know it! We share something nobody can understand, and you freak out when your mother discover our relationship, our love. You can bear to love a woman. That why you are angry! Stop lying to yourself!" Fujino punched the walls not able to bear these words.

"Stop it! I'm not like you!"

"Stop deny it!"

"No! It's you who are in delusional."

"No! You are a lesbian! You like having sex with me! You like kissing me. That I touch you! I don't know why you play the perfect straight daughter, but you are not!"

"You were both in relationship?" Shizuru and Anh just noticed Natsuki presence who was too shocked about what she learnt.


	8. Chapter 7 Break

Before I go to holiday, I write a short chapter ( a christmas gift?), I will probably come back in January ( so no other chapter in December). It seems you want I continue even if I don't know about ShizNat in my story, thanks for those who review, I love your comments. And thanks for voting in my poll. So I will continue with what I have in my mind. Also I wish you a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

* * *

_**After high school graduation**_

"Shizuru how could do that to me!' Natsuki sobbed inconsolable.

"I didn't do anything wrong Suki..." Her friend said tired and almost angry.

"You are simply a liar!"

"I'm not ok! Calm down…Please, could you stop shouting like a crazy person? Everybody watching us and I will become deaf if you continue."

"Oh I apologize for my rudeness your majesty. I don't want you feel ashamed because of me or provoke a scandal with our perfect seito kaichou. It was horrible for you to stay with somebody noisy like me." Kuga mocked with hostility.

"I never said that…It's not for me I worried, you know I don't care what people said behind my back. You just make yourself a fool." The honey haired beauty warned calmly.

"I feel like you don't care about me anymore. So it's the truth tell me now, I don't want to see your false and despicable smile!"

"It better I go now or our conversation will be ugly."

"Yeah, right… you know only how to escape, you are just a coward!"

"When you're calm, we will continue this conversation."

"**NO!** It's now or never Shizuru! I won't change my mind." The brunette informed seriously catching her friend's wrist who letting escape a sigh.

"As you wish Natsuki."

"I think we go together to Tokyo University. We promise we will go together after graduating Fuuka. I believe in you…that why I work so hard…" The latter said in hurting voice, Fujino can felt Natsuki's hand shaking. She didn't want to end their friendship like this. But she hadn't any choice. So she brought her mask and cold tone. She had to do it now and faster, after that they will heal rapidly.

"No! You work for yourself not for me…for your bright future…you are clever person…."

"...that doesn't matter! Why? I want to know! You promise me."

"Sometime Natsuki we can not do what we want, and that's life. I'm not the only one in your life who does not keep her promises; sometimes it's impossible. You are not a child anymore, you have to understand. We are friends but we don't have to stuck like Siamese twins all time."

"What's wrong with you? How dare you! You leave me to go to study in USA without warning me! And I learn with help of Tomoe!" The emerald eyed teen barked furiously, Fujino turned emotionless.

"It's not that you will be alone."

"What are you talking about? Why are you so cold? Did I do something wrong?"

"No…also it's only five years…we can keep contact…mails, phone call, and sometime I can come in holidays…"

"It's different! I will stay in Fuuka and you will forget about me…you will have more interesting rich friends in Harvard. You do not need me as I need you." Before continuing Shizuru gave a long peck on Kuga's forehead who blush deeply.

"Kannin na…but I have to go now…my parents are waiting for me Natsuki…if you don't want to see me again…I can accept it…I won't force you to stay my friend...goodbye…."

"No Shizuru, please don't leave me…I need you…"

"…" Fujino walked without watching her friend in cried. And tears run her delicate face.

_"It's not true, you don't need me Natsuki. You have Mai…and Nao…all you friends who hate me…and I have enough being your friend, it's tiring. Yes I'm your loyal friend…it's hurting me the way you treating me, and you didn't even notice….I'm not your dog…I need to stay away from you…before I will hate you …and it last thing I want…beacause i care about you...we have to stay away before it's too late."_

* * *

_**Chapter 07: Break**_

"You were both in relationship?" Shizuru and Anh just noticed Natsuki presence who was too shocked about what she learnt.

"No/Yes!" Shizuru and Ahn responded simultaneously glaring each other.

"Yes or no?" The brunette growled impatient.

"What concern you? It's not your business." Luu said coolly poking her finger in Kuga's chest who slap it furiously. She hated this woman.

"Yes it is! Shizuru is my business!"

"That so cute…but also kind of pathetic…a love sick little puppy….Did she know her best friend, her sister, her family, the person she trust most have these kind of forbidden feelings? No? So you are like me? We can talk about Shizuru and her beautiful body. Did she always have this little scar behind her ears? And her Kyoto-ben accent is so hot. I always like her sexy accent. And you Natsuki? Does it turn you on? Did you masturbate yourself thinking about Shizuru moaning your name ? Perhaps now you discover she a lesbian, you have your chance...oh but you are to afraid...that probably never happened. I'm so lucky!" Luu whispered in Natsuki's ears who clenched her fists. She almost punched Luu but a firm grip prevented to do it.

"Ahn enough! I want you to go now!" Shizuru ordered serious.

"Why?"

"You know why!"

"Shizuru did you sleep with that whore? How could you do this mistake! She is your cousin damn it! Are you crazy! It make me sick!" The brunette asked angrily removing herself from Shizuru who bite her lips angrily.

"That what you really think of me Natsuki?''

''..."

"I see..."

"Hey don't be vulgar and mean. You are exactly like me." Ahn added smirking.

"That not true." The brunette tried to prove. Even if she knew Ahn was right.

"Don't lie. Shizuru did you know your best friend is in lov-"

"Shut up you bitch!" Natsuki warned taking with her Ahn in street.

"Why? I recognize this look you have; I have the same like you. You are in love with Shizuru, and she's blind or she did in purpose to don't see it. When I said we are alike, that wasn't entirely true. Contrary to you, I don't have to hide my feelings. And I taste that sweet Shizuru, it's like honey…and when she moaned it's simply erotic…just thinking about it make me wet. And her tongue is a real gift…"

"Shut up or-"

"Or what Natsuki? What will you do Natsuki?"

**"THAT!"**

* * *

Natsuki's words broke Shizuru, how could she judge her without knowing all the truth? Again, nobody listen to her. But afraid what will happen between her cousin and Natsuki tried to follow them in weeding but seller didn't agree. The only way to do is showing her platinum credit card, Fujino can buy the store if it pleased her. When she was in street searching frankly for her friend, she suddenly stopped running and watched horrified her best friend kissing Ahn…

And she felt her phone vibrating in her purse. It was a message from Reito.

**_Shizuru we have to talk about your cousin..._**

The chestnut haired beauty saw slowly her world collapse in piece. It seemed Ahn already put into action her threats.


	9. Chapter 8 Pain

_I just want to say, my story is just A STORY and it didn't have to be realistic or copying exactly Mai Hime. Yes there is a**lot of drama**(I love), and no I don't want Natsuki to eat mayonnaise, and blush every minute (perhaps for another story?). Also for those who don't understand last chapter, don't worry, you will soon understand what happened._

_Just to respond one of guest. Of course I think about the plot and characters. 'The holes' are made in purpose. Too OOC? Well OCC means that didn't correspond with their real character behaviour in movie, anime,... So if you don't like 'melodramatic' or my OOC characters and story, I assume this story isn't for you, there are many other stories in FF probably correspond more your preferences._

_For others who like my story (and fortunately a majority), thank you so much to read, follow, comment.__You guys are awesome._

* * *

**_Fourteen years old Natsuki, and seventeenth years old Shizuru._**

« Shizuru…how did you kiss someone? » Natsuki asked fidgeting, her redden face was hidden with her long blue haired. She cringed slightly, regretting her decision to ask _this_ question. Her best friend stopped writing her homework, her brows furrowed; she titled her head and smiled devilishly.

« Ara…is it a proposal? How bold of you Suki. You make me blush…ecchi…I'm shock and flattered. Do you want I show you that you can learn some subtlety? » Fujino asked flirting; her best friend gulped hard licking in apprehension her dry lips. How yes, she wanted to tastes these delicious and tempter glossy lips. She wanted to feel these good sensations in hers, finally claiming what she always dreamed.

« Oh Hell Yes! NO! I mean…err…it's just a simple question friends said…please don't tease me…I'm serious…please… » Shizuru didn't answer. The brunette bit her lips terrified. The chestnut-haired beauty sighted and became more serious. She didn't like to see an upset Natsuki.

« You never kiss anyone? »

« Of course I do! A lot of girl! I can't even count. »

« Such a player…you disappoint me Natsuki…poor girls they are probably heart-broken. Why are you asking me if you have such enormous experience? »

« NO! I'm not a player! I just kiss ten…seven…well…one girl… » Natsuki admitted shamefully. Shizuru stroked gently Kuga's back.

« Don't be upset. It's alright, it was your first time, and perfection does not exist. That was so bad? »

« Yes…No…I mean…perhaps? »

« There isn't really a way to kiss someone, it's just spontaneous…a moment to share intimacy…deep feelings » Shizuru pondered a moment.

« …how did you kiss…someone? No. How do you want someone to kiss you? » Natsuki shuttered desperate to learn more, perhaps it wasn't a good idea, but she didn't care.

« I don't know, with simplicity. »

« Simplicity? » The green-eyed teenager asked utterly surprise.

« How can I explain it? Hmm…I wish my lover smiles at me and only watch me with lovingly eyes…his hand brushes lightly my face. » Shizuru approached dangerously to Natsuki's face, so close that Kuga can felt her warm breath rolling on her face, and cold fingers touching her burning face, she almost faint when she saw a wide smile in Fujino's face. If her heart wasn't pound furiously, now it will probably explode in piece. She can feel temperature risen her fully shaking body…

« And… » Natsuki croaked with apprehension.

« And? He brushes delicately a lock of my hair. His face approached slowly mine, I know this moment what will happen when his hand brought back to his lips. I close slowly my eyelid waiting his actions, » Natsuki followed blindly her best friend's words. She closed her eyes.

Shizuru kissed gently Natsuki in her forehead. Kuga blinked and touched tentatively her forehead always feelings the kind kiss and she pouted outrageously making laugh her friend.

« Ara, are you disappointed I didn't kiss you in your lips? But we are friends. »

« Of course I am….I…am not! I know we are friends, it will be awkward if you really kiss me…» Natsuki blurred out rapidly correcting her sentence, before revealing her true hidden feelings.

She didn't notice lips crash her owns, before she realized, Shizuru was returning to her place.

Shocked, the brunette touched her lips…it was the first time she lied to Shizuru…but she didn't feel any remorse, because her first kiss was with her dream girl.

« Also Suki, if you are some question about 'sex'. »

« Don't worry, I already watch some movies! Oh crap…» The cobalt haired teenager blurred out deep red when she saw the honey-haired angel giggled in delight.

« Really? What kind? Wrong question, I suppose there is two women who-»

«**SHIZURU!** »

* * *

Chapter 08: Lost (_a big thank to DancingFireStar to help me to correct this part of my story)_

A loud sigh escaped from Shizuru's lips, feeling exhausted from today. It just began, and she didn't want to face Reito, but she hadn't a choice. She entered to their temporary home.

« I'm in the living-room. » A cold voice welcomed her.

Shizuru then went to her destination. Reito eyes were closed as he sat in his armchair; suddenly he watched his fiancée with a new face, like she was a stranger. Fear began forming when Reito shifted his gaze to her.

« Today, your cousin came to my office, and she spoke with me. » Reito said drinking a sip of whiskey. The man wasn't the kind to drink early in the afternoon, or drinking very often. This was very bad, and the Kyoto-ben woman grimaced.

« It seems she like's to talk behind my back…so what did my dear cousin say to make you so agitated? »

« Things you have to tell me, because I'm your fiancé and soon-to-be husband. For example, what about your parents? » Shizuru gritted her teeth not liking the direction of their conversation. Wasn't her life already a mess? And Ahn added more fuel; she hated her so much, what did she do to deserve this melodrama?

« They are not dead like you said. » Reito added getting up from his place finally confronting Shizuru directly.

« I never said they were dead. You simply assumed they are. »

« And you don't rectify my mistake. You never talk about them; you are evasive about your relatives, life, past… »

« I have a complicated family story. » The chestnut haired goddess answered annoyed. It was clear she didn't want to evoke that part of her life.

« Like everyone else. »

« Right, but I prefer to not talk about it. »

« Again, you always try to run away, but that's not what bothers me the most. I learned some other interesting things. » Kanzaki growled irritated.

« Oh? I'm surprised, what did she say? We were dating, or lovers? »

« You were in that kind of relationship. » Shizuru cursed herself that's probably what Luu expects from her; making a wrong move, and she will fall so easily in her trap.

« No we weren't. »

« Then why did you tell me the contrary? »

« I didn't say that, Ahn lied about our relationship. And told everybody for fun. »

« Well that was not what she revealed, but now I understand why we aren't intimate in bed. » Shizuru lost some color and almost collapsed.

« We are intimate… » Fujino said stubbornly and Kanzaki rolled his eyes.

« No we aren't, you don't let me be one with you. You said because you want to wait for our honeymoon, but I feel there's another reason behind your behavior. You don't want to have sex with me, I sense you dislike it…perhaps because I'm a man? Or you have somebody else in your mind? »

« If I understand you, you think I used you, that I was sick enough to accept your ring because I feel nothing for you. During the one year I was playing a role? I wasn't in love with you? »

« Perhaps you love me in your own way…but you also love Natsuki don't you? »

« Yes »

« I knew it! »

« Like a friend or sister, not in a romantic way. And I never used you; you know me! »

« I don't! You so are secretive, sometime I feel like I'm living with a stranger. » Reito remarked sharply.

« … I don't know what to say to make you trust me » Shizuru shuttered almost crying.

« One thing…If you really love me then tell me the truth, I deserve it. Were you ever in love with Natsuki? »

« SHIZURU! Answer me now! » Reito shouted furiously making her take a few steps back.

« …I-In past…yes. »

« Ahn was right, you used me! You can have Natsuki, but you are too afraid of what people will think of you. That's why you play the straight girl, and after that you will cheat on me with your 'friend' behind my back! Did you f*** her?! » Kanzaki roared angrily as he clenched his fists so strongly, they became white. The man tried his best to not cry, but some tears escaped. Shizuru felt guilty...but it wasn't her fault!

« Of course not, how dare to accuse me like that! I'm not like that; I didn't do anything wrong, ever! »

« Except the part when you lied about your family and Natsuki. »

« …You know what? You right about trust issues. It's an important matter, same for me. So I will give you back what belongs to you and you want. »

« What do you mean Shizuru? » Fujino removed the ring from her finger and gave it to Reito who was still stunned.

« Don't play dumb Reito, you are a clever man. Well not totally…I understand if you prefer to believe my cousin's words, a stranger, instead of me your fiancée. If you prefer to hurt me badly and spit horrible, nonsense accusations, then I can't imagine what our marriage will be like. What will happen after, you will always have suspicions about my love. I presume that I was the one who believed in us…It's over. I learned from my mistakes; I won't let you treat me like that! And yes, I'm a manipulative, despicable, person and a lying frustrated lesbian, who used you because I'm afraid what people think about my sexuality. You don't trust me. Fine! Take your damn ring. I don't want it anymore. I cancel our engagement and not because of me but you. Perhaps it's the best decision I ever made; we won't waste our time and future together! » Shizuru walked out and slammed Reito's door loudly. Tears began running down her face; she was hurt just as much as him. Shizuru has finally had enough! She felt her phone vibrating, tiredly she took it not watching who called her, and broke it in two pieces before throwing it on the ground.

* * *

Poor Shizuru, for those you ask if Shizuru is straight or lesbian, here your answer, yes, she's bisexual.


End file.
